I can’t believe it’s been a whole year since I blogged last! 2009 definitely went by quickly, what with all the things I went through during those 365 days. Let me catch you up…
I changed jobs in late 2008. I left a company where I was well regarded, had a great relationship with my boss and coworkers, and a working environment that was laid back and fun (but we got the work done, trust me) for a company that was sorority-like, tense, unsupportive, etc etc etc. Have you heard the saying “It’s better to stick with the devil you know than the devil you don’t?” I probably should have heeded that warning because OMG, I HATED that place. I won’t get into specifics or point fingers, but just suffice it to say that any job where you have to stay prayed up just to go in on a Monday morning (or Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday), is probably not the place for you. That’s where I was at. But God in His infinite wisdom took me out of there in the form of “Thanks for your services, we don’t need you anymore.” Yeah, I joined the ranks of the unemployed for 3 months. Not a good look for a single mom with bills to pay. I tell you what though: Remember my God and His infinite wisdom? He took care of me all through my unemployment. BFF D covered some of our joint bills (I love her!), and I was able to pay my rent and car note, and Farrah’s preschool, despite having little money in the bank. It was truly amazing.
In September I interviewed with a company and instantly felt like I was part of the team. I knew I had the job in the bag. I killed the interview lol. It just felt right. Like I was where I belonged. So it was no surprise when I landed the job…making more than I was making at my last job, where they begrudgingly gave me what I asked for. God was all up and through my career situation! I’ve been here for a little less than 4 months and it’s everything I could ask for in a job. I love the people I work with, I love my boss, I love the location, I love the benefits, I love my corner office with a window (balla status right here ya’ll!), I love the fact that management really cares about the employees. God is so good!
Unfortunately not everything was peachy keen in my love life. You know that song “Love on a two-way street?” Yeah that was me. “I found love on a two-way street…and lost it on a lonely highway.” Ya’ll, I thought I had found The One. Mr. X-Factor. The man I would marry and build a life with. Have pretty cocoa brown babies named Genevieve and Barrington with. Sooooo apparently I missed all the signs that my scenario wouldn’t become a reality because our relationship ended with me throwing a garbage bag of his belongings on the floor of his foyer and demanding my key back.
It’s funny to think back on our relationship and realize that it ended only a few short months ago. Somehow it seems longer ago than that. I can’t explain why. Maybe because I'm moving on? Stopped hoping that the ringing phone was him? Stopped hoping for that silly closure that women seem to need? I gave myself time to feel all of the emotions that go along with a breakup – heartache, sadness, anger, grief, and then acceptance. And then I started to look for the lesson that was surely embedded in this situation. What I learned is that if someone says they love you then their actions have to match their words. Someone who loves you will never let you wonder if they’re thinking about you, if you’re truly a part of their life. They’ll never let you worry about them. The person you love won’t be spotty and non-communicative. They’ll let you in because that’s part of loving – to be vulnerable to someone and let them see that sometimes you don’t know all the answers, you can’t solve all the problems, and darn it, you just might need help. It’s not always fun and walks in the park holding hands. It’s really and truly about letting someone see you at your best and worst and knowing that they’ll love you regardless.
I feel like I’m at a point in my life where I can be in a fulfilling relationship, if that’s what’s in store for me. I go out, I meet people, and I date. I’m enjoying the sense of “what’s next?” Some dates are a bust. No worries, I’m thankful for the experience. Some dates go very well and I’ve made a friend. I don’t look into it any more than that. If it’s meant to progress then it will progress naturally, without any prodding from me. I’m content right now to let things flow.
Oh snap, how could I forget the best part of 2009??? I COMPLETED MY MBA!!!!!!! I can’t believe I have my evenings and weekends back (and yeah some of my working hours too hehehe). I didn’t know what to do with myself for a few weeks, but I quickly learned how to put my free time to use. By doing absolutely nothing that involved heavy thinking. So now that I’ve accomplished that goal, the next is to learn to salsa. Let me go gather my pennies together for lessons…
Love all of you! I hope it doesn’t take me another year to post. I’ll do better! Happy 2010 to you, I hope it’s your best year, until the next one!
